Saturday, April 30, 2011

Choosing the Desert

My passion for writing has been on hold for far too long and its time to write again. There are so many aspects of life that we internally dwell on but if we were to vocalize it, we would realize we are not alone. Whether that comes in journaling independently, having a heart to heart conversation with a trusted friend, or crying out to the Lord, these are all forms of getting outside of ourselves and putting into words what is going on in our hearts. I am sitting down to blog again because writing is my way of speaking what goes on inside of me.


Therefore I am going to allure her; I will lead her into the desert and

speak tenderly to her. There I will give her back her vineyards, and will

make the Valley of Achor a door of hope. There she will sing as in the days of her youth...

Hosea 2:14-15

Two years ago I sat down with a strong woman of the Lord and trusted friend. She took the time to minister to me through verses and prayer. Lately, I have not been able to get them off of my mind. She spoke to me with tears in her eyes because she knew the battle going on within me. What has stuck with me since then is how she told me I had to choose to go into that desert. I was terrified. I didn't want to go into that place. I did not want to be out of my comfort zone. I did not want to "lose control." I told myself I had everything I needed and I would be fine. Clearly, those words still echo in my heart and mind. I am in awe by the God I serve. His love and His patience to see me through even when I put Him at arms length away but pretended to trust Him in my journey.
Perspective in life is hard to attain because we're so involved in the day to day and the struggles we face. We forget to step back and realize that God has our hearts, He has our best interest, and most importantly He has every event in our life working together to bring glory to Him. Yes, we're going to struggle and experience pain but do not forget the pain He went through so He could help us through ours. My choices have brought me to this place of realizing all I need is Him. All I need is to know with all my heart that what I have been through is not in vain and all that I am going to go through in this life will not be for nothing. That is my prayer to keep the right perspective, to not get so involved in myself that I forget I have the Creator of the world wanting to be involved in every laugh, every cry and every moment.
Some of us won't have the choice to go into that desert depending on the Lords will but when there's doubt, remember the Lord is already there waiting. I am writing this for myself but I know we all have our things we're nervous about. Take a step of faith, get out of the boat.
<3